


Breaking Point

by WindMeister8



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist (Anime 2003), Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gods & Goddesses, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional strength, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/M, Hardships, Mind Games, Normal Life, breaking point
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-29
Updated: 2015-06-29
Packaged: 2018-04-06 20:50:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4236162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WindMeister8/pseuds/WindMeister8
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A higher being is in charge of observing the human beings on Earth and dishing out "life events" - or hardships - to those humans. Growing weary with life, he begins a game with one of the human beings - a little baby girl. Years pass by and he watches the little girl grow into a woman. The game still continues but... does he really want to win? And at what cost?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Breaking Point

**Author's Note:**

> **(AU Note: For maximum effect, listen to[this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eb9q0PjQpdc))**

No alarm clock rang to mark the start of a day and neither did rays of sunlight penetrate the shining white palace. But the pale-skinned entity in the shape of a _Homo Sapiens_ – or human being, for those who were of a lower education status – instinctively woke up as if he were programmed that way. He stretched his muscular arms and got up from bed, his long, wispy hair covering his face. He swept his hair backwards, exposing two violet-colored slit eyes. With a yawn, he set about his daily stretching routine, cracking each and every bone in his body. Each snap made a pleasant sound to his ears.

Once that was done, he paced to the ivory wardrobe and opened it, exposing tens of similarly designed black form-fitting bodysuits. Tapping his finger on his jaw, he wondered which to choose and after a minute or so, settled on one. As he got dressed, he hummed a pop song that was currently trending in the human world. He found it hard to admit but he had to give it to humans to make up such catchy songs. 

He tied his usual headband over his head and inspected himself in the mirror. Satisfied with his appearance, he nodded to himself and set out to do his job.

Arriving at the large Soul Observation room, he hopped onto the plush seat and began the process of starting up the system by snapping his fingers. Tons of screens flashed past, and he leaned back, waiting for the initialization to finish. 

Finally, a large map of the Earth appeared and he sat forward on his chair, spinning the virtual sphere with his index finger. When it stopped, he chose a spot at random and it zoomed quickly into a laidback country side. A table displayed the population size and a list of the humans living in the area. Flicking the list, he closed his eyes and let his finger hover over the screen before landing on another random point. 

A picture of the chosen human came into focus and the screen panned to the current location of that human. He watched as the male human received the wrath of his superior for something that he didn’t do because his colleague had pinned the blame on him. Cackling to himself, he felt delight in the little human’s plight. Humans were always so stupid and silly, starting wars over simple issues like which God they worshipped, pretending to be kind to each other when they were both stabbing each other in the back. The list went on. It was so entertaining to watch those little ants struggle through life.

The male human made his way back home, all the while cursing in anger at life’s unfairness as he drove. However, once he reached his small abode, he took a deep breath and rapped on the door. After a short few seconds, the door opened to his wife carrying a small infant. He grinned widely as he walked in, embracing his loved ones, forgetting his work troubles.

Watching the male human’s change in expression caused the violet-eyed being to growl in annoyance. This was not what he wanted to see. Joy and kindness disgusted him. He wanted to see those lower beings groveling on the floor and praying to the ones above for help. Seeing them pathetically struggling and yet living a good life, annoyed him to no end. They were supposed to wail about their fate and resign themselves to him. They were supposed to realize how insignificant they were in this universe. They were supposed to live their lives miserably and without hope. He fed on their misery and hate – it was what sustained him. 

His lips curled into a snarl as he marked the male human for a life event. In this case, the loss of a job. Each human had a limited amount of life events – or hardships – that could be meted out in their short worthless life. However, his status allowed him to bend the rules slightly. He could serve someone more hardships or less as long as the total number of life events on Earth remained the same.

To calm his foul mood, he returned to the map of Earth and selected a different location. Once it zoomed into a small seaside town, he scrolled through the list of humans, specifically searching for one person.

**(F/N) (L/N).**

His eyes sparkled with excitement as he tapped his finger on the name. A picture of a sweet, smiling lady appeared and he watched her as she sang a joyful children’s song to her toddler while bathing her in the small tub. Instantly, he felt much more at peace, his irritancy at the previous human fading into the background. He didn’t know why he often felt this way when he observed her. 

Since birth, something about this lady had captured his attention. He didn’t know why. There was nothing special about her. She wasn’t very pretty – just average-looking. Neither was she exceptionally bright. Everything about her was average. Still, her mere existence captivated him.

So he began throwing some hardships down her way. First, he made her an orphan. Her parents were killed in a car crash and she was sent to a rundown orphanage that was managed by a sullen spinster. Kids bullied her because of her small size but no matter how many beatings or verbal abuse she suffered, she always took it with a brave smile. At first, he thought she was not right in the head; some screw must have gotten loose. But when he saw her slipping spiders into those kids’ beds, he knew she was much stronger than those big-sized kids. She wasn’t physically strong but rather her mental fortitude and emotional prowess was exceptionally developed for her age.

It was that strength she possessed that made him start his own game. A rather cruel game, perhaps, that was played without her knowledge. He would constantly serve her hardship after hardship and observe her reactions to life’s adversity. More interestingly, he longed to know when she would eventually break down in front of him and admit that she had had enough. Admittedly, his life was dull and this game served as recreation. He couldn’t wait for that moment of victory – the thought of it left him drooling in anticipation.

He had started off with small problems – negligent foster parents, irresponsible teachers, and big bad bullies. She made it through all that with perseverance, a constant smile on her face, and some tricks that she learnt to keep them off her case. Sometimes, she cried when the beatings were exceptionally bad. He almost thought she would give up at that time and was a tad disappointed in her, thinking that the game he had created would be over so soon. But after a good cry, she only wiped her tears away, cleared her throat a few times, and then she was back to her usual self.

Satisfied that his opponent had got up on her feet and continued the challenge, he continued to dish out bigger issues. By this time, he had been observing her for more than a decade. Humans would probably call him a guardian angel but he was anything but that. He simply watched her go about her day to day activities, smiling and laughing with her small group of friends and then going back home to her foster parents to do chores and help with the house. He didn’t feel anything at all towards her – no fondness, no attraction, but also no annoyance at the way she went about life. 

When she was but a young budding teenager, she fell in love with a handsome delinquent in school. He watched as the two young lovebirds went through the ritual of courtship and unlike with any other couple he observed, he felt something tug at his heart every time the guy laid his hands on her. The uncomfortable feeling persisted and he became exceedingly annoyed. So he sped up his plans – lashing out with a drug abuse charge. The guy died of a drug overdose but since she happened to be present at the scene, she was sentenced and sent to a juvenile center.

Obviously, she mourned the death of her first love for a period of time and he took delight in the fact that he had separated the two lovebirds. She quickly overcame it though, and learned to adapt to the living conditions and the people at the juvenile center. Physical abuse was commonplace and just like her childhood, she had to learn how to protect herself. He watched her every wince of pain and although he never felt anything when she had gotten beaten during her younger days, he couldn’t help but hiss in discomfort with every blow that landed on her scar-ridden body. 

However, he waved it off as being uncomfortable around extreme violence and continued his wicked game. Once her sentence had ended, her foster parents threw her out of the house and no school would take her in as a student. Forced to the streets, she had to scrape out a living by doing odd jobs. 

Despite the circumstances that were shoved onto her, she maintained a cheerful on-look on life. Not because she was idealistic or innocent, but because that was the way in which she maintained her sanity. She knew life was not a bed of roses; far from that actually. But whenever she came across obstacles in her path, she would recite her mantra, “Even this shall pass”. That was her belief, her unwavering faith that no obstacle was too big to block her path in life. When people asked her whether she detested God for her tough life, she merely smiled and said, “He’s only testing me. And I shall prove it to him that there’s no test that I can’t pass.”

He would never admit it but those words gave him heart palpitations. He was proud of himself for choosing such a worthy opponent and even though he continued adding hardships to her life, deep in his heart, he believed that she would overcome it. Sometimes, he wondered whether he would be happier if she lost to him or if he was defeated. On one hand, once the game ended, he would have nothing to look forward to. On the other hand, if she won, it would mean that a human – a lesser being – had beaten him in his own game. 

That very same human was now blossoming into a young woman. He seethed in fury as tons of men started giving her the eye and making advances on her. It wasn’t because he liked her, but he reasoned that he was the only one who really knew and understood her. He was the only one who had been with her throughout her life. So when she rejected her many suitors courteously, he breathed a sigh of relief.

To his chagrin, however, she inadvertently fell in love with a handsome young man and before long, they got married. Throughout that period, he gritted his teeth in frustration as he was unable to spare any more life events to disrupt their union. Their every sign of affection made his blood boil. He barely made it through each day without pulling all his hair out.

Finally, his time came when the change in population dynamics granted him access to some spare life events. He immediately put it to good use – but in a subtle way. The entrance of a younger, sexier lady into the husband’s life disturbed the waters of the newly wedded couple’s relationship. (F/N) was quick to catch on her husband’s quirky behavior and although she didn’t want to believe it, she took action by tracing him to the other woman’s house. After the two adulterers were caught in the act, she ran out of the house, and drove to some deserted lake, crying her eyes out at her husband’s betrayal.

He felt satisfied with the results, thinking that she had deserved it. However, he didn’t expect that the affair would deal such a blow to her. The next few weeks were filled with periods of incessant crying, bickering and when her husband finally asked for a divorce, she became withdrawn, retreating into her shell. 

“Was the game over?” he wondered to himself. For the first time in his life, he was confused. Confused as to why she suddenly seemed to lose her strength, her will to live – all because of a cheating husband. Where did that strong kid he first saw go? That strong kid who picked herself up time and time again no matter what he threw at her?

But life is filled with surprises. She found out that she was pregnant. The news of a baby seemed to snap her out of her trance. She touched her belly every day, marveling at the fact that a human life was contained in it. Even though the baby was definitely her ex-husband’s, it didn’t matter to her. It was hers and only hers. Her spirit came back and she worked double hard, trying to earn as much as money as she could for her child.

Of course, he was delighted at the new turn of events. His opponent was back! The game was still on. So he watched as her belly grew larger and larger. When she went into delivery, he felt as anxious as any other father would. He didn’t know why he felt that way but it must be because he just wanted her to come back to her normal self so that the game would resume indefinitely. 

A baby girl was born and he was pleasantly surprised at the similarities in appearance between the baby and her. It was almost like a miniature her. As the baby grew into a toddler, she was the happiest he had ever seen her. Being a mother had given her the most joy in her life. 

A sweet refreshing air now polluted his demeanor after constantly observing the mother and baby together. He was slowly losing his distaste for humans and he found the thought disconcerting. He had to do something about it.

It had been a long time since he had assigned her a life event. Now was as good a time as any. Humming to himself, he decided on one and rubbed his hands together, waiting for it to take effect. Soon enough, the phone rang and she told her daughter to stay put before running to the kitchen to answer the call.

The small kid fidgeted a little before turning back to the bathtub, her towel still dangling over her tiny shoulders. She edged closer, wanting to touch the water again. Tiptoeing slightly, she leaned over the tub but her movement caused her to slip on the wet floor. With a small yelp, she fell forward, her head coming into sharp contact with the floor of the tub, immediately knocking her unconscious.

By the time (F/N) came back, it was too late. She hurriedly lifted her child out of the water, propped her up and shook the little body vigorously. Shouting her child’s name repeatedly, she tried performing CPR but the little one was long gone. After a few minutes of resuscitation, she accepted the inevitable fact that her child was dead. She broke down in tears, cradling her little girl in her lap while sobbing her name.

Leaning back in his chair, he drummed his fingers together. The child’s death was regrettable but the game had to go on. Yet why did he feel so… uneasy?

The child’s death took an even bigger toll on (F/N) than he had expected. The loss of her husband had caused her to be severely depressed. But the loss of her child simply took away her very soul. She resembled a walking ghost within a few days with her gaunt face, hollow eyes, and disheveled appearance. During the funeral, which was held at a cheap cemetery, she barely said two words. No speech was made. To friends who came to offer support, she merely nodded in acknowledgement. As the gravediggers poured soil over the small coffin that housed her child, she watched with an unmoving expression, her eyes vacant and lifeless. 

It wasn’t until after everyone had left and she was the only one standing before the freshly made grave that she finally stepped towards the small cross that protruded from the ground. Grazing her fingers over the picture of her smiling baby girl, she began to speak quietly, her voice barely a whisper.

“God, you’ve tested me again and again. I always took it with a smile, thinking it would soon pass. I never complained, I never questioned.”

He listened closely to her for it was the first time she had ever spoken to him. She had never prayed, never asked for help, never begged for forgiveness, and never had she cursed at him for her misfortune. These were the first words that were meant for him and only him to hear. 

She smiled disdainfully. “I guess you must hate me a lot for you to always be giving me such tests.”

Clutching her chest with one hand, she continued. “If you hate me so much, then punish me. Take my soul. My child has nothing to do with this. Why take my child? Take me!” She ended her sentence strongly, her high-strung voice filling the silence of the cemetery.

He shook his head in puzzlement. It wasn’t because he hated her. He was just playing a game. He didn’t want to kill her. No… he only wanted her to live…. and observe her life. That was all he ever wanted.

“Wait…. No…” she whispered.

Her breath came out ragged, her eyes now glowing with hatred. “What even gives you the right to just take someone’s life? Who the hell are you to determine who lives and who dies? Who gives you permission to fuck around with people’s lives??” she spat out venomously.

Taken aback by her sudden outburst, he almost fell out of his seat. People had cursed him before – that was nothing new. But for her to utter such spiteful words hurt him deeply, something he had not felt before. It wasn’t his fault. He had been tasked with this ridiculous job of looking over those worthless beings that were of lower status than him. And she was just… someone whom he liked playing with. Someone whom he wanted no one else to touch. 

Her shoulders slumped as the energy that had invigorated her outburst quickly left her. In deep wrecking sobs, she whispered, “J-just give her back. I-I can’t live like this anymore. What have I done wrong to deserve this? Please… just let me die.”

It was over. The game was over. His opponent had just admitted defeat. Had given up on life and begged him for death. 

But… why was he not happy? Why was he not jumping up and down in joy? His cheeks were starting to feel a little moist. He brought his hands up to his eyes. They came away damp with what seemed to be tears. Was he… crying?

He couldn’t understand the turmoil of emotions that were raging inside him. What was she to him? He didn’t want anyone near her. He wanted her to himself. He wanted to watch her until the ends of time. He…. loved her? Laughing at the thought, he turned back to look at the image of her. Seeing her distressed caused him to feel a pang in his heart. He ran a finger down her image as he whispered to himself, “I…. love her?”

Even though there was no one to answer his question, he already knew the answer. Hard as it was to admit it, he realized that he was in love. With a human. A lesser being. A being whose spirit he had broken. And because she was broken, he had lost his sense of purpose. He didn’t know what to do with this new finding. 

He loved her. So what should he do now? At this moment, the only thing he wanted was for her to smile at him again, to regain her spirit and live. But what could he possibly do? He pondered the question for a moment before snapping upright. Grinning sadly, he got up and walked out of the room. With a deep breath, he prepared himself for his first and last journey to Earth and snapped his fingers twice.

He appeared in the graveyard where he saw her a few meters in front of him. As he walked towards her, she noticed his presence and turned to look at him with a tear-stricken face. He hissed under his breath, pained by the fact that her condition was caused by him. Facing her for the first time, he discovered how beautiful she was in his eyes despite her current disheveled appearance. 

“W-who are you?” she asked in a wavering tone.

Wordlessly, he moved to the grave and kneeled down beside her. Clapping his hands together in the form of a semi-circle, he closed his eyes for a second. Then, he slammed the palms of his hands onto the freshly dug soil. Bolts of blue light ran across the plot and she gasped in shock as the soil beneath them rumbled slightly. 

The coffin that held her child began to surface and she backed away in fear. Suddenly, a child’s cry was heard from the confines of the coffin and her eyes bulged in confusion. She stared at him, curious and wary about what he had just done. He nodded and tilted his head towards the coffin, indicating that she should open it.

Cautiously, she inched forward and removed the lid. A gasp escaped her lips as she saw her daughter alive and in tears. Lifting her out of the coffin, she hugged the little child tightly, laughing in joy and relief. 

A tiny smile made its way across his face as he watched mother and child reunite. He had done his job and it was the first and last time in his life that he would ever feel such happiness. By reversing a life event, he had broken all the rules he was meant to follow. And that came at the cost of his soul. It was time for him to leave… forever. As he was turning to go, he was stopped by her voice.

“Wait!”

He hesitated and turned back to face her. She looked radiant and full of life with her child in her arms.

“Thank you. I.. I have nothing to offer you but-“

“That’s ok.” He spoke for the first time. “But I have to leave now.”

“Ca-can I at least know your name?” she asked.

He hesitated. In all the centuries that he had lived, he never knew his name and never needed one. He had a job that he had to do – that was all. Year after year passed by and he never felt happy. Looking down on those human beings made him feel better because they all had something he never had. 

Companionship.

Every single one of them had someone else in their lives. And he, the one who ruled them, had no one. It made him bitter and furious. He despised them. Until she came into the picture. Day after day of observing her had made him fall for her. She made him feel complete. She made him feel that life was worth living. She gave him companionship and a purpose in life. It was ridiculous how he could fall for a being that he so despised. Yet, here he was, sacrificing his life for her happiness. And it was a decision he would never regret. He had been jealous of human beings and that jealousy had caused him to take away what was so important to her. He had been ruled by jealousy but now, no longer.

As he felt his soul leaving him, he smiled at her.

“My name is…”

 

“Envy.”


End file.
